"It's true that absence makes the heart grow fonder. But we also know that many things may happen during those times of separation..."

As the popular saying goes, "history repeats itself". And it really does. The cycle just never stops. We stop communication, he courts someone else, something happens that would make him stop dating that girl, he comes back and "dates" me, things will be perfect, then he starts fading away. Again. Here I am again. Hoping and waiting for the same guy. Over and over and over again no matter how many times he has turned me down and chose someone over me. How stupid.

I thought this time would be different since we are mature, so I believe. But I guess I'm wrong. For the millionth time.

I don't know what would make me really let go and decide not to love him anymore. Maybe him telling to my face to stop loving him and that he loves someone else. Or someone who would show me that he isn't the only guy in the world; that there is someone else out there who would be ready and willing to love me and commit to me.