this day is my turning point :|

I don't know if I should be happy about today. Last night before sleeping, I asked for a sign--a sign that would determine if he still likes me or not. If he texts me "Gudmorning Rej" [yes, with my name on it :))] like what he used to, then he still likes me. If he doesn't, then it's otherwise. It's not that I'm rushing things or whatever. I just want to know if I'm still hoping and waiting for something.....or if I'm just waiting in vain, expecting for nothing and waiting to get frustrated.

Morning came. I waited until 11:59am for that good morning greeting. But there was none :( There was no text from him the whole day. No sign of him. None anymore. I saw him pass by our classroom. That split second made my heart thud and made me hope that he would glance and see mee looking at him. But he didn't. Things have truly changed.

When my friends and I were about to leave the building, we saw him. He walked with us. We talked about "unserious" matters. Matters that are just fillers to a conversation. Though we laughed and talked the whole time, something is just so different. Something has really changed--his feelings for me.

I admit it's my fault.....or at least I should be blamed for the most part?O_o Whatever. It's too late. I can't do anything about it. I won't force myself to someone who doesn't like me anymore. Fine. Maybe it's just a fling or something--something that started so nice and suddenly ended just like that. I didn't see it coming. All I can do now is to let go--let go of that which I thought I have, that which I thought would linger.

Praise GOD for my 7th term sched :D

GOD is amazing!

An hour ago, i was thinking if i would turn on the computer to check if the file i saved in the USB is still there kasi baka my brother removed it. So i turned it on. I really had no plans on signing in sa YM but i did haha. Then I asked RJ Angeles when and what time is the schedule ofr pre-enrollment for next term for non-DLs, non-athletes and non-SCs. He didn't answer my question but he said something much better :D He told me to try logging in the system. I again told him that i'm not a DL kaya it would really be impossible for me to get in. He told me there's no harm in trying naman. And so i did. At my first try, i couldn't log in because i gave the wrong password! Another try and still wrong. When i was about to give up, something just made me try again. Praise God i was abe to get in! :D As i clicked the Pre-Enrollment icon, i wasn't really that optimistic that it will work. Once again, Praise God that it worked! So there, after some minutes of waiting, i was able to encode my desired sched :D

Prior to this, while watching Gary V's concert (TV), i was having a hard time fixing 3 sets of schedule that i will choose from. Von Vergundia sent me the list of available schedules. Even if i was done fixing it, i still wasn't that confident that one of those scheds will be followed since i'm not an advance enrollee. But i kept on praying that i may be able to have my desired sched. And true enough, God gave me the desire of my heart.

This experince just occured so perfectly. A while ago, Pastor Peter talked about having expectant faith. I learned that having faith also means that we should already expect and believe that God will give us what we are asking for (if it is His will). We just have to put our faith and trust in Him.

If He has done this truly overwhelming instance to me, He will also let it happen to YOU :D And if He has blessed me in this very small issue, how much more in the bigger and more "complicated" ones? :D

Let me just share the verse that Pastor Peter gave a while ago which really struck me. It is in Habakkuk 2:3 and says,

"...If it seems slow in coming, wait patiently, for it will surely take place. It will not be delayed."

I don't know if this is even related to the pre-enrollment thing. But it just dawned on me that if we are waiting and praying for something/someone, though it seems like it has already been taking us forever for that which we are waiting for, we just have to trust God that He will give it to us in His perfect time. It won't delay. It will just come when we need it perfectly. God might not give us exactly what we're asking for, but He will surely give us something/someone much better--His best. :D

salamat VON VERGUNDIA :D

I just want to make a special mention to my dear friend Von. Hahaha!

Von, kung hindi dahil sayo hindi ko maririnig ang phone ko na tumunog. Kung hindi ko yun narining tumunog, hindi ko makikita agad yung text niya and late ako makakareply. Kung late ako nakareply, it's too late kasi naglalaro na siya. Wiiiii thanks Von! :D

Kasi po ganito yun. Kachat ko si Von and sabi niya nood daw ako ng QTV kasi nandun sila. So kahit nasa baba yung TV bumaba ako to see Von. Ayun sakto pagbaba ko tumunog yung phone ko na iniwan ko sa baba. Yey! :D

thank you VON!ü

blue.

As i look at the latest post that i have here, it really shows that it has been a while since i last visited this site. I can say that a lot of things happened during those times that i didn't write here--things that were "blog worthy"! Haha.

I may not be able to write everything because of my memory gap (wow parang matanda lang ah!). Maybe those that i can remember are the ones which really affected me.

I actually don't know where to start. Well, fine. Let's do it randomly :D

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The week(s) before YHE Week. The moments i can remember here except for the committee meetings were the moments spent with him. [random] Thanks to my friend who asked him to come with us to the cafeteria. But he left after a while. Another day I saw him on the 7th floor and he stayed with in the LRC me while i was waiting for our meeting. And that was the last time i was with him :(

Can't say the other one! >.<

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YHE Week. Oh. That was the most tiring and productive week that i spent and so i strongly believe. It was fun though. FUN :D

I saw him but that was it. As in literally :(

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Why is he like that? He doesn't text me anymore like he did before. Basta it's so different. Well yeah i definitely don't blame him and i know i don't have the right to demand & expect from him and he isn't obliged to be there for me all the time. Sadly, i think he has lost his interest on me :(

Why now?O_o Now that i'm starting to fall for him. Or maybe the saying applies. The saying that we only get to appreciate someone once they're gone. Not totally gone, just little by little fading away :(

I guess it's my fault. Or

maybe it's just not meant to be.